Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Dramatic Squirrel

My inner voice is an hysterical drama queen. I've been super sketchy for a few days now, so I sat down with her, and was like, "what's up?".
"OMFG! My life is SO F*CKED UP I want to die!!! (exclamation points ad nauseum)
Ok, ok, so lets calm down and use our big girl voice and try that again.
"I am VERY frustrated, and VERY unhappy about some major aspects of my life"

So, that's better than taking every Rx drug in the cabinet and heading out for a moonlight swim (oh hey, if I ever do disappear never to be found it is purely coincidental and not intentional but, well, ironic).

Still, it's a pretty strong indication that there needs to be some changes 'round hurr, y'all.

At work today we were treated (and it was a treat) to a mini seminar by 'don't call him a motivational' speaker Clint Swindall. He started off with a story that hit real close:

"There was an young man, visiting an old man, who owned an old dog. The young man sat on the old man's porch with them for a spell, when he noticed the old dog was doing a lot more whimpering and groaning than is usual for even an old dog. So he asked the old man, What's up with your dog? And the old man replied, He's layin' on a nail, and it bothers him some. So the young man, like, wt?, says, Well, why'nt he move?!. To which the old man says, like, duh, I guess it ain't painin' him near enough for that!"

Hello, epiphany. I've been layin on a couple'a damn nails for a long time. Whimpering and moaning about them. But never getting off my old rotten ass and moving to a more prime porch spot. Because, you know, what if that so called prime spot sucks ass? What if there are worse nails over there, than there are here? And I'm kinda used to these nails, they suck, but at least the spots they're pinching and poking have become quite numb by now. Those new maybe nails may be in new un-numb places! Why would I go and do that?

So, thanks to Clint and my life coach, I am taking a closer look at things. Dramatic rodents and all.

Who knows. Maybe I will get off those g-damned nails sooner than I imagine.

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